Monday, March 23, 2009

An Update on My Busy Brain

As I mentioned in my last post, I often struggle with falling asleep at night due to my "busy brain" which likes to keep anxious thoughts swirling at a pace that would put the Tasmanian Devil to shame!
I'd discussed it last week with Susan and came up with some plans to try to alleviate that. It's been working well but I knew Sunday night would be the true test. That is my worst night because I beat myself up over what I didn't accomplish over the weekend and I get myself worked up about what needs to be done at the office in the morning.
Yesterday was a pretty good day. Bianca and I had been out all day on Saturday. From skating lessons in the morning, then a lunch get-together and outlet shopping in the evening. I have to share this because it's so funny. At the outlets, we went to 3 stores for Bianca and then I wanted to make a quick stop in one store for me on the way out. After a few minutes in that store, Bianca says "Mama, are you almost done because I don't have very much time to spend in here!" Like she's got some big plans later, or what? She cracks me up.
I plunked Bianca in my bed with the TV on while I started what I'd intended to be some minor sorting of her new spring/summer clothes. Well, it turned into an all-out wardrobe changing. I pulled out the storage bins and started pulling out too-small clothes and the really heavy winter clothes so I could put them away. I had things layed out all over her room. Finally around 1am, I called it quits. She was still awake! We both slept in my bed until the beautiful hour of 10am! How nice! Through the day, I was able to do all the laundry, put away her clothes, do some organizing, prepared last years spring clothes for sale on Ebay, dishes, cooking & some snuggle time. I had to feel good about that!
When I finally got into bed at night, my mind went to it's familiar place of criticism: "You didn't run the dishwasher, you left a load of laundry in the dryer, you should have done didn't do that...etc." intermingled with "Make sure you wake up early, gotta do XYZ at work, need to sure you finish ABC, but not until you blah, blah, blah." With deep breathing, I was able to turn it around, praise myself for what I did get done and remind myself that I had plenty of time in the morning to begin planning what needed to be done at work. I was successful and I slept solid through the night. Yay!!


mile191 said...

wow, what a being able to like yourself, in small parts, and re work your thinking. what an example.

thanks for sharing...

you are amazing. May I mention you in a post i am doing about my reflections today...?

Just Be Real said...

Kim, I am impressed! Thank you for sharing an encouraging post. Glad you are able to change your thinking in a positive way. I appreciate your sharing! Blessings.

Kim said...

Of course, Mile191, you can mention me.

Thank you, both, for the encouragement. It feels good to start to learn how to control these intrusive thoughts.

Shannon said...

I suffer from the exact same issue and now, I'm taking lessons from you... I can't believe the difference in just a couple of days!!

Just Be Real said...

Kim, I am glad that you are getting somewhat of a handle on these thoughts! Keep it up girl!!!

Kim said...

Shannon, it's been amazing, a real turnaround and very quickly at that. In fact, at least for now, I'm not even going to ask for a new Xanax prescription. I think I can do this without them!

Have you been trying it also?